Disconnecting the dots
by djn
Summary: Pointing out and making fun of those things in FFIX that make you go "Ok that's a bit ridiculous!". Hopefully it's not just me.....*CHAPTER FOUR UP*
1. Vivi in Alexandria Part 1

Hey guys. Thought I'd write these little scenarios to gently poke fun at some of the things I thought were a little ridiculous in FFIX....In a loving way of course, it's my favourite game of all time! PLEASE R&R, it would be really useful to know if it's just me that laughs at these things or what! Criticism of course accepted.....Cheers!

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Vivi in Alexandria - Part 1

One of the most unique and indeed beautiful sights in Gaia can be seen on the Mist Continent, later in the summer months when the days are long and the nights humid and close. On clear evenings just as the sun begins to dip below the horizon, the sky is bathed in a combination of light reflected from the planet's twin moons; a stunning swirl of blues and reds, stark in contrast, but not unharmonious - they seemed to complement each other in the way that some things just do, like Dali and its windmill, like Lindblum and its airships, and like the royal assistants' (Zorn and Thorn) frankly disturbing way of communicating with one another.

And it was on one of these spectacular evenings that a young black mage made his way cautiously down the main street of Alexandria towards the castle, staring up at the massive buildings that sprung up around him on all sides. It was the first time Vivi had been to such a large town - so many people! And not just people either. There were hippos wearing clothes. There was also a duck in a bright purple tailcoat that seemed to be strutting around with a trumpet, which it blew unnecessarily frequently, startling the group of nobles it appeared to be leading. Every time this happened, they began to mutter darkly among themselves about how said duck would probably be more useful served roasted on a platter along with some plum sauce, or perhaps an orange-flavoured liqueur.

Most annoyingly though, (for Vivi at least), was the rat wearing a huge red cap that came tearing down the street straight towards him as if shot out of a cannon. Vivi did his best to avoid the oncoming rodent, but despite his attempt to deftly sidestep right at the last second, the rat still crashed straight into him, knocking him to the ground. It was almost as if the rat was aiming deliberately for Vivi, or that it was impossible for Vivi to avoid him no matter what he did; in any case, the rat sped right off again after some making some stupid comment about it being Vivi's fault, leaving the young mage to pick himself awkwardly off the ground. A little girl handed him his play ticket, which had been jarred loose from the impact. After nodding at her in what he hoped looked like an appreciative manner (he understood that, due to his lack of face per se, trying to communicate using facial expressions was not the easiest thing in the world), Vivi continued up the street to the main courtyard, still drinking in the sights and sounds of the unfamiliar city.

Not five minutes later however, Vivi's day had taken a serious turn for the worse. What annoyed him most was not the fact that his ticket had just been decried as a fake by the inspector, but that he had failed to notice the glaringly obvious error himself. 'I Want to be Your Crow'? Vivi wasn't sure how big his brain was, or if he had a brain at all for that matter, but it bothered him slightly that he didn't say something when he was buying the ticket off that dodgy-looking man with about ten arms.

In any case, the inspector in the ticket booth had mentioned to him a person named 'Alleyway Jack', whom he said could could give Vivi some pointers about a card game popular in Alexandria, known as Tetra Master. He'd even given Vivi a few cards to start with, which Vivi thought was rather generous. Although it was little consolation in comparison to missing a play performed by the renowned theatre troupe Tantalus, Vivi thought he may as well make the best of the situation, and set off to find the mysterious Alleyway Jack.

Going first to the pub, a logical starting point he figured, he noticed a man at the bar with about ten arms.

"How odd...." Vivi thought to himself. He was sure he'd run into a guy with loads of arms before. Like the one who sold him his dodgy ticket. But this one had different hair - they were probably just part of the same species. Who was to say in this day and age?

"Umm...excuse m-me, sir?" the young mage began nervously, as he approached the multi-armed man. The multi-armed man turned round to face him, a look of alarm spreading rapidly across his face.

"No refunds kid." he suddenly said, his voice slightly high pitched.

"Refunds?" said Vivi, a little nonplussed at the man's strange demeanour. "I was j-just wondering if...if you were Mr. Alleyway Jack? I was gonna ask you about how to play a card game called Tetra Master? E-except I got a few cards from the slightly suspicious old man at the ticket booth, and was wondering if..."

"OOOOOOHH, yes, yes of course, of course you're here about cards." said the multi-armed man, suddenly looking very relieved and allowing himself a large gulp of whisky from his glass. His face twisted quickly into one of disgust, and he began to choke loudly.

"Do you actually enjoy drinking whisky? It's far too strong for me...." said Vivi, giving him a small slap on the back.

"Oh yeah, yeah, love the stuff." said the multi-armed man, still purple in the face from a combination of coughing and lack of oxygen. "And by the way, I am indeed Alleyway Jack. Ask me anything you need to about Tetra Master."

About half an hour later.......

"Right, well I think I've got the basics sorted," said Vivi. "There were just a few things though that I wanted to know though, like some of the finer points of the game you know....?"

"Yes yes, ask away son." said Alleyway Jack, whose breathing had just about returned to normal by this time.

"A lot of the time, the outcome of a battle between two cards seems a little...how can I put this...random?" Vivi said slowly, not wanting to sound like he was insulting the hobby about which this man was surely very passionate.

Alleyway Jack stared for a second. And then another second. And another. Eventually, the seconds all combined to produce a rather lengthy period of silence, during which Alleyway Jack opened and then closed his mouth quite a few times.

"Well....", he finally said. "Of course, we both know that it's all based on the numbers on the cards. And you know that various complicated mathematical calculations take place when determining the outcome of a card battle..."

"I know that", Vivi interrupted, "but don't you think that it's a little ridiculous that sometimes a really good card with a huge amount of HP will lose to an apparently much worse card with low HP?"

"U-ah..err...um..well it's...you see....um...yeah..." Alleyway Jack spluttered.

"And another thing, Mr. Jack sir," Vivi said eagerly, keen to learn as much from this abundant source of card game knowledge as he could. "If the cards can level up and their stats can increase as you suggest, what's the point of levelling up weak cards like the cards I've got? Because their stats won't increase that much will they? And then someone who has slightly better cards but who hasn't put any effort into increasing their stats can just come along and thrash me, thus destroying all the hard work I've put in to levelling them up?"

By this time, Alleyway Jack couldn't have looked more confused if he'd tried. This kid was asking way too many complicated questions, and of course, as a Rank D treasure hunter, he had better things to do.

"Wow, is that the time?" Alleyway Jack suddenly said, cutting Vivi short as he began to ask a question about the coin flip at the start of the game and how it always seemed to be biased towards the opponent all of the time. "Listen son, it's been great chatting, but I've got to go - really need to pop to Daguerreo and hang about by a bookcase without reading any of the books on it."

"Oh...." said Vivi, not knowing where 'Daguerreo' was, and also little disappointed about Jack having to leave, but still glad to have learned so much in what felt like such a short space of time. "Ok then. Well thank you for teaching me. Maybe we could have a game if I ever run into you again?"

"Yeah, like that's gonna happen..." Alleyway Jack muttered to himself, smirking.

"Pardon?" said Vivi, politely.

"Ah, er, I mean, yeah of course kid, I'd be happy to play you any time." Alleyway Jack said, still with a smirk on his face. "Later, kid."

And with that, he gulped down the last of his whisky, promptly started coughing again, and left the pub bent over and gasping for air. Vivi watched him go with a sympathetic look in his bright yellow eyes - at least, he hoped they looked sympathetic....

"What a nice man. Shame about the drinking problem though..." Vivi thought to himself as he jumped off his seat. And with one last look around the pub, he strolled through the doors, and back into the cool Alexandrian evening.


	2. Fly Choco Fly!

Number 2: Fly Choco Fly!

"Hey Mene!" cried Zidane happily, as he arrived at the clearing where the moogle was usually to be found. "Look what happened to Choco this time!"

No longer was Choco a deep shade of blue, as he had been for some time. His feathers now gleamed bright gold, clearly distinguishable from the yellow he was before Zidane got a hold of him. It was almost as if he was glowing slightly, the sun's rays shining off of his magnificent plumage in all directions.

"Wow kupo...." Mene breathed, awestruck for a second at seeing his friend in such a majestic state. "So it's true....they really can become like the sun kupo! And you know what that means?"

"Er...no?" said Zidane. "I was actually hoping you could tell me what new ability Choco has now, he's not done anything good since I opened that chest..."

"Kupo, he can FLY!" Mene exclaimed excitedly. "He can take you to the ends of the earth and beyond kupo!"

"Wow, you serious??!" Zidane couldn't contain his excitement. Although the Invinvible could fly them anywhere they needed to go in the blink of an eye, there were many unexplored islands and archipelagos that were too small to safely land the airship on. Choco's new ability opened up a whole new realm of possiblities for his adventurous spirit!

"Mene, thanks for the info. I'm gonna take him for a spin right now!" said Zidane, wheeling Choco around and making ready to leave the forest. "As soon as I get out of the forest, I'm gonna fly around a bit, maybe just around the Mist Continent for now, see what it feels like!"

"OK kupo!" Mene said. "Just find yourself a normal forest and you'll be off in no time!"

"....sorry, what?" Zidane looked puzzled. "As soon as we're clear of the trees, surely Choco can just take a run-up, start flapping his wings and get us underway?"

"Um...actually no, kupo..." Mene said, not seeing Zidane's problem. "Choco can only take off and land in forests."

"Erm...ok.." said Zidane, frowning. "So what you're telling me is that I can only take off from forests and land in other ones? But what about the tiny islands that don't have any forests at all?! How am I supposed to use Choco to explore them now?! Why would Choco be able to land in forests, but not on flat, wide plains?! You do realise that makes no sense whatsoever, right?"

"Well the thing is kupo, is that..." Mene started, "er...well..um...it's because..."

He stopped, frowning slightly, his small face contorting into one of concentration for a second. "Hang on kupo, you're right! That doesn't make any sense at all! Why would Choco be able to take off and land among all those trees, yet be unable to take off or land from a plateau or some other flat piece of land?! Kupo kupo kupo....."

"So how did you know that he could only fly from forest to forest then?" Zidane asked, now thoroughly let down by the prospect of not being able to investigate the many small and, to tell the truth, probably barren islands that were dotted off the major continents.

"A friend of mine from the Chocobo Air Garden told me" Mene explained. "He said he'd been told by some really overweight Chocobo who's apparently meant to be like the chocobo king or something. He's usually a pretty reliable guy, so I didn't really question it. Thinking about it now though...kinda sounds a little ridiculous doesn't it?"

"Yeah, just a bit..." Zidane rolled his eyes at how gullible Mene was. Whatever or wherever this 'Air Garden' was, Mene clearly hadn't been there - if it actually existed at all. He'd probably just been tanked up on Gysahl Greens again.... And a fat chocobo king? Wow, not even Eiko would fall for that one.

He sighed. "Oh well. I guess there'll be a few new places I might be able to reach now. Maybe I'll go have a mosey some other time...."

"OK kupo. Take it easy" said Mene, who'd gone to the rock behind which he hid all the prizes for Chocobo Hot and Cold and had begun rummaging around.

"How did you get all that stuff by the way?" Zidane asked. "I mean, there's some pretty rare gear there. Like, how did little ol' you manage to get hold of a Robe of Lords?"

"Err....don't worry about it kupo, just contacts you know? Friends in high places etc." said Mene, nervously.

"Riiiight....well, bye anyway." said Zidane, urging Choco out of the clearing, the bird responding with a loud 'KWEH!'.

"Goodbye kupo!" said Mene, sad that he'd be all alone until Zidane next came back.

The price to pay for stealing all those prizes he guessed.....


	3. How can I say this?

3. How can I say this....

Zidane hated Kuja. Before, he could honestly say that there was no-one he truly hated. Hate was such a strong word. Sure, he disliked the nobles who walked around with their noses in the air and who expressed a heavy disregard for anybody without 'The Second' or 'Of Lindblum' after their name, but he would never go so far as to say he hated them. They were still people after all....just.

Now though, pure hatred surged through his body as he looked into those dark, mocking eyes, a cruel smile playing around the mouth of the one to whom they belonged.

"So tell me what it is already, you demon!" Zidane yelled, clenching his fists tightly, imagining that they were round Kuja's neck and were slowly administering some serious suffocation-based justice.

"I'd watch my mouth, if I were you", Kuja sneered. "Surely you haven't forgotten that I hold your friends' lives in my hands?". He looked elated, taking great pleasure in the power he held over Zidane.

Zidane growled. He understood the situation perfectly well - the only option right now was to do what Kuja asked and think of something later. Although he wasn't sure what would be different about later; he wouldn't be remotely surprised if Kuja didn't hold up his end of the bargain...

"I'm sending you to a place called Oeilvert." Kuja said abruptly, jolting Zidane out his momentary reverie.

Where? mused Zidane. He'd never even heard of a place called 'Oeilvert' before. It certainly wasn't on the Mist Continent - he knew every inch of that rugged landscape; every mountain peak, every plateau, every stream for crying out loud.

"Where's that?" he asked suspiciously.

"South of the Seaways Canyon on the Forgotten Continent" replied Kuja, clearly still amused at Zidane's frustration.

Despite being in such a dire situation, with his friends' safety on the line, Zidane's adventurous spirit stirred a little within him. The Forgotten Continent was only a rumour back on the Mist; he'd always believed it existed however, confirmed of course when he received his a map of the world from Regent Cid.

"Hang on, what was the place called again?" Zidane asked, sure he'd misheard the first time.

"Oeilvert!" Kuja said irritably. "O-E-I-L-V-E-R-T! Surely even an imbecile such as yourself could understand that the first time!"

"Wait a second....there's an 'O' at the beginning? So why are you pronouncing it 'Eye-il-vert' then? Surely then it would be pronounced 'Oh-il-vert'?" said Zidane, frowning slightly.

"Er, no, it's quite clearly Oeilvert" said Kuja, pronouncing it as he had before and, for the first time, showing a glimpse of impatience. "Anyway, who cares how you say it?! You're going there to get me the Gulug Stone if you value your friends' lives and that's all you need to know, you cretin!!"

Minutes later, Zidane clambered aboard the Hilda Garde along with Steiner, Freya and Quina. Much as he hated leaving Dagger in that damn palace, he figured it would be safer to leave her there than for her to come on a wild goose chase to a ruin with a magic barrier surrounding it. In any case, Dagger's ability to use magic had diminished significantly since Alexandria had been destroyed - the less stress for her the better. With a loud noise, the airship's engine sputtered into life, slowly powering it out into the open sky. This better be quick, Zidane thought, as Kuja's palace became smaller and smaller until it faded into the distance....

------------- Some time later.... -------------

"Look at this view!!" Zidane yelled, as he raced to the deck of the Hilda Garde 3, wild with excitement at the prospect of being able to travel the world at will.

Eiko shot him a dark look, which he failed to notice. She wasn't entirely convinced that he hadn't done anything to Dagger - why else would she have cut her beautiful long hair? Judging by the way Steiner was acting as well, she felt she wasn't alone in this opinion....

"Man, it feels so good to get away from everything!" Zidane cried happily over the roar of the engines as his hair was thrown about by the wind. "No more palace, no more Zorn and Thorn, no more Oeilvert..."

"Ah yes, Oeilvert,"said Freya, her voice drifting, almost reminiscent, as if remembering an old friend. "Seems like a long time ago now..."

"Haha, you mean Oeilvert right?" Zidane smirked as he returned to the cabin to stand beside Freya - the Burmecian had pronounced the place 'Oil-vert'.

"Yes, that's what I said, Oeilvert!" Freya replied, looking quizically at Zidane, trying to figure out what he was on about.

"Freya, it's pronounced Oeilvert! Oh-il-vert! There's an 'e' in there you know!" Zidane said, trying and failing not to laugh.

"Says who? What makes you so cocksure?!" Freya snapped back, her raised voice carrying through the cabin. Zidane looked briefly surprised at Freya's somewhat aggressive reply, but he quickly recovered, his features sliding back into an easy smile.

"I do!" he began, "and..."

"I think you're both wrong." Vivi said suddenly, making everyone jump. Zidane smiled kindly down at the little mage who was looking at his feet, clearly embarrassed at having been so forthright. "How would you say it then, Vivi?"

"Um...I j-just assumed that the 'Oe' was pronounced 'e', so I would say it like 'Eel-vert'...but that's probably wrong, I'm just being silly..." Vivi said bashfully, adjusting his hat as he so often did.

"Well I think you're right, Vivi" said Dagger, who had just come up from below deck. It took a second for everyone to recognise her.

"That's exactly how I would have pronounced it. In any case, does it really ma....yes, Adelbert Steiner? Something you'd like to say?" she said suddenly, looking sharply towards Steiner who had made a noise that sounded like a combination of a suppressed cough, a laugh and a sneeze.

"N-no, of course not! Forgive me, Prin-...um, Miss Dagger!" the knight said nervously, his armour rattling slightly.

"Speak your mind, Steiner." Dagger said, pursing her lips together in a successful attempt to show her displeasure. Zidane smirked.

"W-well Your Majesty...it's just that..um...you don't seriously agree with Master Vivi's pronunciation do you? No offence of course, Master Vivi!" he added hastily.

"Oh, none taken!" Vivi responded immediately. "I probably shouldn't have said anything anyway, Dagger's getting angry...."

"And what problem is there with that pronunciation, may I ask?!" Dagger demanded, her nostrils flaring in annoyance. "I think it makes most sense to pronounce it'Eel-vert'!"

"Y-yes of course Your Majesty, of course, but...well..."

"So how would you pronounce it then, Captain?!" Dagger persisted, almost spitting the words out of her mouth.

"W-well, surely it would be 'Ale-vert', because the 'Oe' at the start is pronounced that way sometimes in some dialects, I believe....?"

Silence reigned for a long two seconds. Then, simultaneously, every single member of the party, bar Steiner, burst into uncontrollable laughter. Even the crew could barely keep themselves together; the small task of keeping the Hilda Garde 3 in the air prevented them from doing so.

Zidane was, however, nearly crying; Dagger actually had to use the brim of Vivi's hat to dry her eyes; Amarant had to prop himself up on the side of the cabin; Freya was making a conscious effort not to snort as she tended to do when laughing a lot; Eiko was rolling around on the cabin floor, occasionally banging her fists as she tried to contain her laughter .

Face burning with humiliation, Steiner composed himself as best he could and walked to the deck, where the noise of the engine diminished the shouts of raucous laughter that continued to echo around the cabin for several more minutes.

When the final giggles had subsided, he returned to the cabin. "Well," he said, with as much dignity as he could muster, "I guess we're just going to have to agree to disagree on that one."

Quina meanwhile had been standing by, watching everyone laughing at Steiner with a thoroughly bemused look on his/her face. "Why you all worry about how place name is said?!" she/he said. "You no can eat, so why you worry?"

Everyone looked at Quina. The comedy moment having been brought to an abrupt end, they all left the cabin shaking their heads.


	4. Get on with it!

Hey guys...sorry it's taken so long for the update! R&R if you would....

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4. Get on with it....

Zidane dived to his right, barely avoiding the comet that left a huge, smoking crater exactly where he had been standing only moments before. Panting, he picked himself off the ground just in time to see one of the dirty little sheep spit a great ball of what appeared to be dust at him, an evil glint in its' beady eyes.

Coughing and spluttering profusely, the genome glanced around the clearing, his concern how his companions were faring against the unrelenting onslaught of Comet and Float spells evident.

Steiner was nowhere to be found - upon performing a devastating Climhazard sword technique moments ago, one of the Yans had promptly let out a massive sneeze, carrying such force that Steiner was thrown some considerable distance away from the clearing in which they were fighting; Zidane doubted he'd be back any time soon. The evil sheep seemed to possess unbelievable powers, despite their unimposing and, in Eiko Carol's mind, 'cute' appearance....

"Going to Vile Island might not have been such a great idea after all..." Zidane thought as he was, yet again, levitated off the ground by one of the Yans. Although the name alone might have been enough to put many potential adventurers off, it only served to empower Zidane with an even greater desire to explore it, and it took a great deal of persuasion, charm and the odd lie to convince the rest of the party to join him on this particular excursion.

To be honest, he was probably screwed either way. If they somehow made it out of this predicament alive, the rest of his companions would surely kill him anyway, making this a real lose-lose situation. But hey, valuable experience right?

"Dagger!" Zidane yelled, spotting the Princess in a corner of the glade. She was in the process of reviving Vivi, who had been flattened by a Comet, and was now lying at the bottom of a crater in the ground.

"What, Zidane Tribal?!" Dagger yelled back, as Vivi struggled to his feet, grabbed his staff and started readying a Flare spell.

Zidane could tell she was mad - the use of his surname was a dead giveaway. She had been the most reluctant to come to Vile Island in the first place, and he figured that this little escapade did nothing to convince her that she had made the right decision.

"Maybe now would be a good time to see whether or not the 'Beast from the Dark' is all Hades cracked him up to be!" Zidane yelled back, narrowly avoiding another Comet.

"Fine," she snapped back, "but you'd better hope he is, for your sake! Because if these Yans don't get you, I just might!" And she shot Zidane a deadly look before pulling a small stone out of her pocket and began to speak to it.

"How is it possible that she can fight three of the fiercest monsters we've ever faced and still find time to be mad with me? Geez...." Zidane thought, as grabbed Vivi and yanked him out of the way of an attempt to snort him from the battlefield.

Suddenly, the whole scene turned black, and Zidane was freed from the world. Space flew down to meet him - the stars surrounded him, blinking and glistening as his spirit swept through the heavens.

He spun, relishing his ability to move so freely, and as he did so his breath caught in his lungs. The red moon of Gaia was before him, a truly majestic sight, glowing brightly and so marvellously superior to the inky blackness surrounding it, with its' now seemingly insignificant collection of stars.

A blueish-white light appeared suddenly at the centre of the moon, startling Zidane from his momentarily awestruck state. Something large, very large, and blacker than the darkness of space was at its core, and it moved with great speed towards Zidane.

"Aaarggh!" Zidane yelled silently as he flew out of the path of the great beast, forgetting for an instant that he could not be harmed in his present state.

As the monstrosity screamed past however, he caught a glimpse of just what it was. "That's that ship thing we fought in Oeilvert!" he breathed, as he began to fly alongside the gigantic vessel.

He started slightly as he heard Dagger's voice ring in his head; "Zidane, that's Ark! You know that monster you said you'd beaten!". She sounded breathless, and he couldn't blame her - the thing was huge, much bigger than the incarnation he'd encountered in Oeilvert.....

About five minutes later......

The hail of darkness crashed down into the forest clearing, rocks and earth and Yans flying in all directions, rending the once flat clearing into a jagged mess of dust, soil and splintered trees. Dagger sighed, relief setting in as she spyed the mangled bodies of the three Yans that had caused them so much trouble, just noticeable underbroken branches and crushed rocks. With a sense of relief, she spoke, dismissing the mighty eidolon back to the darkness from whence it came. And she had a good mind to send someone else there too.

"ZIDANE TRIBAL!"

zidane was sitting on the other side of the clearing, breathing heavily as he got to his feet. Vivi came to stand beside her, shaking slightly, possibly from the ordeal he had just faced, but equally possibly from fright at the rage that emanted from the Princess.

Zidane glanced momentarily away from the princess, perhaps deciding whether it was worth just running for it, but began shuffling towards her, head bowed low in what he hoped was the most repentant way possible.

"S-sorry..." he began, as he neared the princess and the mage, but Garnet cut him off before he could continue his apology.

"Sorry?! SORRY??!! Oh you're not SORRY right now Mister Tribal, but I can assure you you will be! Do you have any idea what you got us into?? Did you even think about the consequences of bringing us to this wretched island?!"

"I..."

"NO, YOU DIDN'T!! We could all have been killed here today, do you understand that??! DO YOU??!" she shrieked, looking quite deranged.

Zidane opened his mouth, decided that whatever he had to say almost certainly wasn't worth it, and promptly closed it again. Dagger turned and stalked off, heading towards Steiner who had, at that moment, reappeared across the clearing, yelling the princess's name. Zidane turned slowly towards Vivi, who was still shaking.

"W-wow..." the mage stuttered, "She's scary when she gets mad..."

"Yeah, tell me about it..." Zidane replied. "Good job she summoned that eidolon though. Not sure we'd still be here if it weren't for that!"

"You're right..." Vivi agreed. "But..."

He stopped. Zidane looked curiously at the little mage, who had started to re-adjust his hat.

"What?" he asked.

"Oh...it's nothing really," Vivi muttered, "it's just...well, I can't really say anything, it's an eidolon with incredible power, I can't question it..."

"Hang on..." Zidane said slowly, "Are you thinking what I'm thinking? That it took Ark ABSOLUTELY AAAAAGES to attack those Yans?"

"Well...yes actually," Vivi replied, glad Zidane had said it first. "Didn't it take FOREVER? I mean, when he was transforming at the start, does it actually need to take THAT long? I mean, why start out as a ship if all you're going to do is turn into a giant metal man? Why not just stay as the metal man the whole time?!"

"Exactly!" exclaimed Zidane, "and what's with all the flashy lights and stuff, was that all necessary? Man, we could have stopped to have a picnic and he wouldn't be done with those Yans!"

"We could've played next year's card-game tournament in Treno!"

"Found Mognet Central!"

"Rebuilt Burmecia!"

"Found Rusty a wife!"

"Found Kuja and beaten him!"

"Teehee!" giggled Vivi, surprised at his own daring to mock the legendary eidolon.

"Come on Vivi, let's get back" Zidane said, clapping his hand on Vivi's back, still laughing at their little exchange, and the pair began to follow behind Dagger and Steiner, who was had been fussing incessantly about the welfare of the princess.

"Something funny Zidane? You think this is all a big joke?!" Zidane immediately stopped smiling as Dagger glared at him, and returned to the 'apologetically sombre' look he had adopted earlier. Something told him it would take a while before she forgave him for this one.....


End file.
